B34 - Dancing (Part 2 of 5 )

(Part 2 of 5)

I danced most of the songs that I knew the steps to with three of the four women at the table. There was only during one song that I had an opportunity to talk to her and while it was awkward for me at first, as we talked I began to feel comfortable as I discovered that we had many things in common including our search for our selves and our spirituality. While it would have been nice to carry on with the conversation, this was a dance, and so we danced, but not always with each other. It was interesting to compare the feelings I got from both the mother and daughter as I danced with both during the evening. The daughter was what I would call alive, passionate and expressive in her dancing while the mother was more mechanical and subdued is as best as I can describe it, although I could feel that underneath the controlled façade, she also had the same passion that the daughter had but it wasn’t being expressed. The dance ended at midnight and we all split up and went our separate ways although I still would have liked to take to her.

I hummed and hawed until Wednesday evening to call the daughter to get her mothers phone number. I felt like a nervous school boy in reverse; that I was talking to the daughter asking her for her mothers’ number. I feel she sensed my nervousness as she softly chucked and gave me her number. I called, but there was no answer and the answering machine had a French message so I just said what I had to and left my name and number. About an hour later she called me back and we spoke for a good hour on the phone. We discussed many topics relating to our personal lives which I wouldn’t go into at this time but it was interesting how we both lived parallel lives in some instances. There is another dance coming up this Saturday evening and she is going along with others members of her dance group, part of which were the people I met last week. I stated that I had been to the last two and that I had planned to go to this one too.

As I was writing the last sentence I realized that I had meet two younger women at the last dance a month ago that were also taking lessons and that I danced quite a bit with during the evening. I remember feeling that both these women were passionate about their dancing and that they danced as if they were fire so to speak yet each was different. One danced like an active fire, with flames and rhythmic movements while the other danced with the shimmering heat of deep glowing and smoldering embers. Humm? It should be an interesting Saturday night! I’ll let you know in a couple of days.

John

PS: In my attempt to keep this post short I failed to mention that during our telephone conversation I expressed whatever issues, fears and emotions that came up.

PPS: One important thing I also forgot to mention was that this woman also reminded me of another woman that I took ballroom dancing lessons with 16 years ago after I got divorced. I was attracted to her but the only thing we did was dance lessons once a week and the odd practice. More of my denied and lost hopes, dreams and desires. It's interesting how all these little "personal" things that you feel aren't relevant or important are at the very crux of the issues you are dealing with.